The Birth of Baby Rose

Before I get into Rose's birth, here's a little back story with links to my other birth stories (in case you have nothing better to do). 

When I was pregnant with my first daughter, Grace, we planned to have a home birth which ended in a hospital transfer and c-section due to "failure to progress".  With Eddie's birth I thought I was destined for another surgery but was able to have a successful and redemptive vbac at a birth center with amazing midwives and a chiropractor who got him into the right position! 

One week from birth!

When we moved to Texas and I found out I was pregnant with my third baby, I was somewhat undecided on how I wanted to deliver. While I had had an amazing experience with my son, I didn't know any midwives in the area and to be honest, I felt like the pressure was off to go that route since I had a successful vbac under my belt. I scheduled an appointment with my obgyn and began to discuss my preferences for birth. I was quickly reminded that because I was "advanced maternal age" and attempting another vbac, that I would be considered "high risk" - insert all the eye rolls here - and therefore not allowed to labor in the tub, would need continual fetal monitoring, had to deliver by their cutoff date and so on. I was disappointed but not surprised by these restrictions. I told my doctor that with Eddie's birth I had delivered him on my hands and knees and wanted to know if I would have the freedom to decide what position I wanted to deliver this baby in, to which he smugly replied "oh, I don't catch babies that way". I left my appointment and found a midwife. I wouldn't allow this man to dictate every aspect of my birth. I made up my mind to try for the home birth I had set out to have 5 years earlier. Thankfully, I found my amazing midwife Monica and after our first phone conversation (it was almost an hour long!) I knew she was exactly who I needed to help bring my baby earth-side!

My two previous pregnancies had both gone postdate (my daughter was almost 42 weeks!) so it was no surprise when I woke up on the morning of week 41 still pregnant. The night before I had asked Monika if she would feel comfortable sweeping my membranes and trying some natural methods of induction. She agreed and said she would be over the next morning. Before she arrived, I had my first sign that labor was nearing, I had some show and lost my "plug". This hadn't happened with my two previous labors so I was excited to know that my body was already doing work. When she got to my home she did a check and told me I was about 2cm. She did the sweep, I took some homeopathic tinctures, walked and did breast pumping cycles for a few hours. I was having strong Braxton Hicks contractions but couldn't say that they felt like labor yet. Monika decided to leave for a little while to give me some time to relax and see if my body would "tip over" and start labor. Before she left, she checked me one more time and I was at a solid 3cm. This was encouraging since I had never dilated that much before my water breaking. I made dinner and got the kids ready for bed all while having intermittent contractions about 10 minutes apart but they weren't getting stronger or more intense. My parents live on the same property as we do and they offered to take the kids for the night "just in case" which was a huge blessing to not have to worry about them. I talked to my midwife again after sending the kids next door around 8:00 pm and she told me to relax and we would reassess in the morning. Rich and I watched a movie and my contractions spaced out even further and were now 15-20 minutes apart. By this point I was disappointed that we had done all of that work earlier in the day only to have things fizzle out. 

About 11:00 pm we went to bed. I had been laying down for maybe 5 minutes when I had a strong contraction that felt much more intense than what I had been experiencing during the day. For the next hour my husband and I timed the contractions and waited to see if they would slow down. They didn't. I called Monika at midnight and told her things were picking up. She said she would get on the road right away. We also called my mom to let her know what was happening so she could join us.

When she arrived at my house an hour later, and I knew I was definitely in active labor. I was still walking around, in fact managed to put on a pot of coffee for the her but things were starting to get pretty intense. I remember having a contraction in the kitchen that put me on my knees and thinking "ok, it's really happening". I didn't think the contractions I had been having earlier were doing much but when Monika checked me I was already at 5cm! I was so excited to hear that news, I was halfway there! She suggested that I get into the tub and labor there while she got set up and called the rest of the team to come. I have to add this to my story, I've always read that getting in the tub too early can potentially stall out labor, so when she suggested I get in I was a little skeptical. I thought, it's too early, I shouldn't be getting in yet, what if things slow down. HA! Things did NOT slow down but they did feel about a million times better in the hot water. I labored in the tub for around an hour but started feeling really nauseous. Poor Rich earned bonus husband points that night for holding a trash can for me to get sick in!! I'd never gotten sick during labor before and I knew it's usually a sign of transition but I was in total denial because I had only been having "real" contractions for less than two hours. 

I got out of the tub and decided to labor sitting on the toilet for awhile. I had done this during my son's birth and if there was one bit of advice I could give to moms during birth, it would be to get on the toilet. It puts you and baby in such a great position and allows you to "labor down". And ladies, less pushing time is a GOOD time! Then, I moved to the bed and tried to find a comfortable position but by then that wasn't happening. These were the hardest contractions of the labor. I can remember laying on my side with Monika laying towards me speaking calming words, my husband kneeling next to the bed rubbing my back and my doula at the end of the bed massaging my feet. The contractions were right on top of one another and I felt like I couldn't even catch my breath between them. I really struggled to relax during them and found myself arching up and squeezing a washcloth as hard as I could as they hit. I don't know how long I was on the bed, this part of labor gets a little fuzzy. They say you "go inside yourself" and this is exactly what was happening. I could see things going on around me but it was like I was in a different realm. 

Then I started to feel "pushy". I felt my body wanting to bear down but my mind couldn't comprehend that it was time yet. I got up and went to the bathroom again. I felt the most relief in that position and the urge to push got stronger too. Monika encouraged me to listen to my body and so I began to put force behind the contractions. A few contractions later, there was a loud "POP", my water broke! Another benefit of laboring on the toilet, no mess! At this point, I heard Monika say to me "ok, time to get up, we don't want to have baby here" but I couldn't quite bring myself to move yet. I stayed through a few more contractions and then finally mustered up the determination to get back on the bed.

I tried pushing on hands and knees (like with Eddie's birth) but I couldn't seem to get any "traction" and felt my pushing wasn't doing much. Then, I tried pushing while lying on my side and finally wound up on my back, with Rich next to my head whispering encouragement and holding me. I felt Rose moving down during these pushes and soon I could reach down and feel her head.

By this point I was D.O.N.E. with labor and ready to get my girl OUT and on the next contraction she crowned! Without waiting for another, I pushed again and she was HERE!!!

The best feeling in the world!

Rose Evelyn Faith came out pink and squalling and perfect at 4:06am (FOUR HOURS after I called Monika) 11/11/18, 7lbs 12 oz and 20.5" long.

It is so incredible how you can go from the most intense pain you've ever experienced to pure joy and relief in a matter of seconds and that is exactly what happens in those last moments of labor. There was such a beautiful presence that filled the room the moment she was born. It was sacred and emotional and above all PEACEFUL. I brought her to my chest and we all rejoiced in the wonder of the new life God had blessed us with. With my husband holding me and my mom standing close by, happy tears were shed by all. 

The postpartum activity was purposeful but unhurried and my husband and I relaxed on the bed as my midwife and team completed their tasks. After a short time, my mom went next door and woke up Gracie. She was able to meet her baby sister minutes after she arrived and witness her mother during her strongest moment. She was beaming as she held "her baby".  Monika and the team stayed with us a few more hours to ensure all was well with Rose and me, then they were ready to be on their way. They tucked us into bed, said goodbye and left us to rest with our sweet girl until their followup that afternoon.

2 hours postpartum

  

 

The home birth I had longed for for five years had happened! It happened quickly, it happened peacefully and it happened without fear! It was one of the most incredible experiences of my life. There was pain and intensity but it was overwhelmingly beautiful, spiritual and life changing and I thank God He allowed me to experience it!

XOXO,
Mrs. B